This letter was sent by John Beckett to all members of the Denton CUUPS Monthly Devotional Rituals group on October 30, 2016.
We have already moved beyond the limits described in this letter, and may move further beyond them in the future. We’re figuring it out as we go, and we’re responding to the work that’s being sent our way.
Seeking Alliances Ritual – Context and Details
The Seeking Alliances ritual is scheduled for Saturday, November 19. There will be preparatory work involved for all participants, so we need to know who is going to participate and who isn’t no later than the end of the Monthly Devotional Ritual on November 11. In order to make an informed decision, you need context and details – this is my attempt to provide that. This e-mail is very long, but if I cut anything then I’m not telling the whole story, and everyone needs the whole story to make an informed decision.
If you have questions after reading this, please ask. You can e-mail the whole list, you can e-mail me privately, or you can call me (972-948-9211). If you want to discuss this face to face, we can talk about it either before or after the Symposium next weekend (but not during the Symposium – that’s not the venue for this kind of discussion) or before the Monthly Devotional (we’re going to need the time afterward to review that ritual, because both Erin and I have reason to believe the Morrigan will have something to say that we’ll need to process).
In the far past
We’ve been discussing this in vague, high-level terms since the March Monthly Devotional at my house. Cyn and I have been talking about it for probably two years before that. We didn’t bring it up to the whole group before March because all we had was a vague indication that we needed to establish some sort of spiritual alliance. We didn’t know what that meant or how to do it, and most of the resources on spirit work are written from the perspective of medieval sorcery (i.e. – summoning and commanding) not contemporary polytheism (forming respectful reciprocal relationships). We also felt that not everyone who needed to be a part of this work was here yet.
At the ADF Texas Imbolc Retreat in February, I had a long conversation with a senior Druid who has extensive experience in working with the dead. That was enough information and inspiration to say “I think we can do this now” and I brought it up at the end of the March Monthly Devotional. I still didn’t have much of an idea what it was going to look like beyond “John and Cyn journey across the Veil on a diplomatic mission.” We set a date to do the ritual in July.
In May, the fire accident happened. There was a lot of work that needed to be done in the aftermath, some personal, some interpersonal, and some spiritual. There was no way we could get ourselves in the right frame of mind to do a ritual this deep and this unfamiliar. Plus we realized there was some spiritual cleanup work that needed to be done first (the Appeasement Ritual).
Sometime in late summer (August, I think) I got a strong, clear message that the Seeking Alliances ritual had to be completed before the Winter Solstice. Why? I don’t know. My experience with the Gods is that They tell me what They want done now, and They’ll let me see what comes after that when I’m done. One step at a time. This is frustrating to me – I’m an engineer, I want to see the blueprints and the project schedule. I’ve learned to go with it. If you’re not comfortable with that, trust me, I understand.
At last month’s Monthly Devotional ritual, we set November 19 as the date to do the Seeking Alliances ritual and October 15 as the date to do the Appeasement Ritual.
In the recent past
Since the camping trip, and especially since the officer elections, many of us have shared some strong feelings about the way this group has been led. I think all of us understand why we did things one way in the past, and why we need to do things differently going forward. My #1 goal as Coordinating Officer for the coming year is to help our new slate of officers to establish the processes and procedures necessary to make our decision making more de-centralized and more democratic.
At the same time, we also performed the Appeasement Ritual to clear a debt owed by this group – by the group as a whole, not by any of us as individuals. A group is a living thing, not just a collection of individuals.
These two factors – the desire to insure Denton CUUPS remains democratic and inclusive, and the fact that actions done on behalf of Denton CUUPS can have an effect on all its members, even those who do not join until the distant future – underline the risk of the Seeking Alliances ritual. Some of us may have misgivings about forming a spiritual alliance. Some of us may subscribe to a worldview that does not allow for alliances with ancestors and other spirits (i.e. – you don’t think it’s possible). And some of us may be worried that the ritual might go badly and the luck (as Linda explained it in the October Study Group) of the entire group would be negatively affected.
These are not idle concerns. As I’ve said numerous times over the past few months, what we do is not safe. Interacting with Gods and spirits is not safe. Working magic is not safe. Opening yourself to ecstatic communion is not safe. Most times the danger is metaphorical and psychological, but sometimes the danger is tangibly real. There’s a reason why you have to be 18 to join Denton CUUPS, and it’s not just to keep parents from complaining. If you want safe, you’re in the wrong religion and the wrong group. Victor Anderson, founder of the Anderson Feri Tradition, said “anything worthwhile is dangerous.” To which Thorn Coyle responded “but not everything dangerous is worthwhile.” Each of us must decide for ourselves what’s worthwhile and what isn’t worth the risk.
The Monthly Devotional Rituals push the boundaries of what is properly UU Paganism, though I think they still fall within it. The Seeking Alliances ritual goes beyond that boundary. While it does not require any specific beliefs, it does require that you be open to certain beliefs about the nature of spirits, namely, that they are real, they are individual, and that they possess their own sovereignty and will (when I say “be open to” I mean that while doubt is OK – can any of us ever be really sure? – outright denial is not).
Perhaps most importantly, it requires that you be willing to accept the obligations and responsibilities that are likely to come out of this ritual (we won’t be asking for favors for free), and that you accept the risk inherently involved in deep spiritual work. I believe this ritual and the follow-up work will be a very good thing for Denton CUUPS and for those who participate in it, but I cannot guarantee that everything will come out OK. What we do is not safe.
The dilemma
The Seeking Alliances ritual is not UU Paganism. Even if we voted unanimously to do it, it would still not be within the bounds of CUUPS’ mission and vision. Additionally, we cannot in good conscience tie the luck generated by this ritual to CUUPS members present and future who don’t even know we’re doing it. I think it will be a good thing, but I can’t guarantee it, and I can’t make that decision for others.
At the same time, I have several deities in my ear telling me “get this done before the Winter Solstice.” I cannot – and will not – tell Them no.
The solution
If Denton CUUPS cannot do this ritual and some members of Denton CUUPS feel compelled to do it, there is only one solution – do the ritual independently of Denton CUUPS.
We do this all the time without thinking about it. Three of our members are also members of OBOD (the Order of Bards, Ovates and Druids) and a fourth has been to several OBOD events. We go to OBOD gatherings and participate in OBOD rituals. We are still members of Denton CUUPS, what we learn in OBOD helps us be more effective members of Denton CUUPS, and we occasionally implement OBOD material into our CUUPS rituals. But there is a clear spiritual separation between CUUPS and OBOD, and if something negative happens in OBOD, it doesn’t impact the members of CUUPS who aren’t also in OBOD.
Other Denton CUUPS members are or have been members of other Pagan groups – it works the same way with them.
Denton UU has had a long relationship with Friends of the Family, an organization that helps victims of domestic violence. We have contributed money to them, our members have worked in their thrift store and served on their Board of Directors, and one year (the first year I was DUUF President, if I’m remembering correctly) we named them our Signature Social Action Project. Denton UU has done a lot of good work for Friends of the Family, but despite our close relations and overlapping membership, there is a clear separation between the two institutions.
Those who meet to perform the Seeking Alliances ritual will form a separate spiritual group. Its mission will be to form and maintain spiritual alliances for the promotion of Paganism in Denton, and for the well-being of local Pagan communities, individual Pagans, and their friends and family (that mission statement is open for modification by those who choose to be a part of the group). It will be a unique spiritual entity, and any alliances we make will be on behalf of this new group, not Denton CUUPS.
If you choose not to participate, you will not be obligated by anything we do.
The limits of the new group
This new group is intended to supplement the work of Denton CUUPS for those of us who want to do this work, not to substitute, replace, or crowd out anything that Denton CUUPS does. It will not hold seasonal celebrations, monthly devotionals, or study groups. It will not advertise or have a public presence on the internet.
The obligations we will take on as part of this work are in addition to our obligations as members and officers of Denton CUUPS, not in place of them.
To put it bluntly, I don’t want to be in a coven and this isn’t going to be a coven.
It will meet occasionally, to do the work that needs to be done. Like maintaining any other relationships, maintaining alliances requires regular attention and work. I expect this will be two to four times a year, though it might need to meet more frequently in the beginning.
The ritual itself
All I have at this point is a rough idea of what needs to be done. There aren’t a lot of resources on stuff like this, and the few that exist tend to be oath-bound, or at least oath-inhibited (people will tell you some of what they do but not all).
There will be preliminary work the week before by all participants: offerings, meditations, and some readings.
There will be cleansing and protection.
There will be invocations of elements, land spirits, ancestors, and fae.
There will be invocations of deities who have supported us in the past. Exactly Who isn’t set yet – it depends in part on who chooses to participate, and in part on the response we get from the deities when we ask Them if They want to be a formal part of this alliance.
There will be a central fire, which must be tended for the duration of the ritual and must not be allowed to go out.
Then Cyn and I will journey across the Veil as diplomatic representatives of this new group. We will make contact with the invoked deities, and after that, with the ancestors we believe would be interested in working with us on the Other side.
Or at least that’s the plan. Cyn and I have both done this kind of journeying many times, but never in a context like this. I trust that the deities who have asked us to do this ritual will protect us from any great harm, but I do not expect Them to make it easy. This will be hard.
Why John and Cyn? Because we’re the most experienced at this kind of work. We have the best chance of getting over the hedge, conducting a successful diplomatic mission, and getting back.
Erin will coordinate things on this side. I do not expect trouble, but if there is, she has the skills to get us back. And she has a close relationship with a certain psychopomp Battle Goddess whose help would be very useful if needed.
How long will this take? No clue. Maybe 45 minutes. Maybe two hours. Maybe till 2 AM. Maybe till sunrise. If we’re still gone at sunrise, bring us back anyway – time runs differently in the Otherworld.
As soon as we’re all back, we’ll compare notes: my experiences, Cyn’s experiences, and the experiences of those on this side. We’ll talk about what they mean and what we need to do next.
And then we’ll go do what we agreed to do.
There will be oaths
The alliance-seeking group will be oath-bound. I trust you all understand why. As I said about the Appeasement Ritual, I will not question or judge anyone who decides they’d rather not participate, for any reason or for no reason at all. But while I can promise nothing, I feel confident in saying this will be an ineffable experience – it cannot be accurately and fairly discussed with someone who wasn’t there because it cannot be adequately expressed in words. So we won’t try.
Further, if you start to get involved in the workings of this group, even just discussing them, the spiritual separation this group is designed to create will start to shrink for you. You could quickly find yourself fully involved in the luck you did not create and do not wish to be a part of.
There will be future opportunities to join
If you choose not to participate in the Seeking Alliances ritual, there will be an opportunity to join the group at some point in the future. Once we figure out what we need to do on an on-going basis and get things more or less stable, we will open the group to others who feel like they’re ready to participate. Since I don’t know what all will be involved, I can make no promises as to when that will be. My guess would be sometime in the spring, but at this point that’s a wild guess.
Are there other solutions?
From the time I began thinking about this ritual and the alliances it will create, my intention was for it to be done by Denton CUUPS in the name of Denton CUUPS. Though I have mentioned doing it with an independent group if necessary, that’s never been what I wanted to do. But the dilemma described above is real, and the difficulties we’ve dealt with recently have forced me to acknowledge that it’s real.
If you see another way to do this, please speak up. I would love to be wrong.
Everyone on this e-mail is welcome to participate, or not, as you choose
This e-mail is being sent to everyone in our Monthly Devotional ritual group, including Gabby and Morgan. You are all welcome to be full participants in this new group and I think it will be a good thing for everyone involved, but I cannot make any guarantees.
Please ask any questions you may have. I’ll do my best to answer them. Cyn will do the same.
If you want to participate, we need an commitment by November 11.
Thank you for your consideration and your support.
John